Happy New Year! Canucks New Year’s Resolutions

Happy New Year, everyone!  I hope 2009 treats you well and gives you lots of lovely hockey memories.  Good luck with those resolutions.  I have a few in mind personally, but all I really want for the start of 2009 is Lui and Mats in a Canucks sweater at the same time.

The Canada/US game was a beauty.  One of the best World Junior games I’ve ever seen.  Great goaltending, hits, buckets of penalties, end to end action, and gorgeous goals of course.  Our baby Canuck Cody Hodgson had three points.  Two lovely assists and a goal.  He could have had 2 or 3 goals if he hadn’t hit a post and missed just wide a couple of times.  You know Pat Quinn loves him because he was out in the final minute taking faceoffs.  A very delightful final score and a very delighful way to spend New Year’s Eve.

Anyways, here’s some New Year’s resolutions for the Canucks. 

Steve Bernier:  To keep up his rather foxy physical game, but start having those many, many chances in front of the net actually go in.  He should also keep giving interviews in that adorable accent.

Kevin Bieksa:  Fight more but don’t get hurt.  Stay healthy.  Play the puck more. 

Mike Brown:  Have a really good year in Manitoba and enjoy his present from the guys for giving up number 13 to Mats Sundin.  Brown should also promise to keep that beard he’s got going on.  RAWR.

Alex Burrows:  To keep annoying guys on the other team, and to get his shorthanded goal scoring mojo back.  He should answer more questions in French too.  Yumm.  Be his awesome self and show Mike Gillis that he’s a dumbass if he doesn’t resign him with a tiny bit of a raise.

Rob Davison:  Make more highlight reel hits.  Build on his one point with the Canucks.  Don’t be afraid to dish the puck more.  Give more interviews because he’s very…twinkly.

Pavol Demitra:  To stay healthy!  And be a beast with Sundin or with the twins.  It wouldn’t hurt if he kept telling us how much he loves Vancouver.

Alex Edler:  Less turnovers and more beautiful end to end goals.  Skate the puck more.  Put that sophomore slump behind you.  Have fun and swagger a little.  Keep being adorably shy and get interviewed more.

Jannik Hansen:  To keep doing everything he’s doing and not lose that happy little grin.  Bust that goal scoring slump.  Get into a little trouble with Burr and Kes.

Darcy Hordichuk:  To write more hilarious blogs for Canucks.com, update his website, and keep protecting our boys.  Oh and maybe stop answering questions by the media with Trevor Linden :P

Jason Jaffary:  To play exactly as he has been on that fourth line and enjoy all the time he gets in Vancouver. 

Ryan Johnson:  To get healthy and back in the lineup.  I miss him.  Give more of those friendly, classy interviews. 

Ryan Kesler:  More of the same.  Don’t get injured.  More of those hott individual effort goals.  Demand those idiots in the East give him Selke nominations.

Jason LaBarbera:  Enjoy your brief time playing with your home province team and try to play well until Sanford gets back.

Lui:  Just fix that groin and come back 100%. 

Willie Mitchell:  To stay your badass gritty self and protect your goalie’s net but maybe leave the joining the rush to your buddy Bieksa.  Heh.  Keep smiling. 

Lawrence Nycholat:  To make AV play him more.  Don’t be afraid to move to puck.  Give more interviews.  I feel like I barely know anything about Nycholat.

Shane O’Brien:  To send the NHL referees a present so they’ll stop giving you penalties.  Stop taking penalties, except for fighting majors, because it’s fun when you fight. 

Matty Ohlund:  Make more NHL hits of the week.  RAWR.  Keep that very hott team leading plus/minus.  Hit the net a little more.  Be adorable.  Smack JP Barry and Gillis’s heads together until they agree on an extension so you can retire a Canuck. 

Taylor Pyatt:  Get that foot healthy and come back a 6’4″ monster.

Mason Raymond:  To not lose that speed and excitement and finally cash in on those multiple chances. 

Rick Rypien:  To show us that he’s not dead, and can stay in the lineup for more than a few games.  Another epic fight with Carcillo.

Sami Salo:  Go see someone while you’re on injured reserve and get outfitted in titanium.  When healthy, continue scoring OT winners that the goalie can’t even see.

Curtis Sanford:  Get that groin healthy.  There’s no need to copy everything Lui does.  Heh.  Play like he did against Ottawa, continuously.

Cory Schneider:  Realize that if you go back to Manitoba, it wasn’t because you messed up, you just didn’t really get a chance to play much.  Have fun in your last few weeks with the Canucks.  Resume ass kicking domination in the AHL.

Daniel Sedin:  Move even higher up the goal scoring leader board.  Play exactly as he has been.  Don’t get worn down in the stretch run.  Prove all those whiners wrong that you disappear in the playoffs.  Show that there’s no way that you and your brother shouldn’t be extended.

Henrik Sedin:  More beautiful passes.  Shoot more.  Stop taking those hooking penalties.  Keep up the great faceoff stats.  Have fun with Sundin on the power play.  Don’t get worn down in the stretch run.  Prove those whiners wrong that you disappear in the playoffs.  Show that there’s no way you and your brother shouldn’t be extended.

Mats Sundin:  To get into game shape quickly.  To not lose a step.  To love Vancouver.  Enjoy playing with our Swedes and everyone else on the team. 

Kyle Wellwood:  Keep being your awesome little quirky self.  Score a few more goals even strength.  Have fun with Mats.

Note:  I just changed Big Baldy from the “Other NHL Dudes” category to the “Canucks” category. WOOO! Exciting! Heh.

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