The Great Blogger Ego Boost

Today, Mike Gillis said the swirling rumours about Torts’ imminent firing were started by bloggers. I know, right? The Canucks have been spiralling down the standings since the beginning of January. Their head coach tried to fight another team’s head coach, on camera no less. Ryan Kesler is allegedly dying to be traded. And even though the team had one of the most mind numbing, embarrassing losses in recent memory the other night that people all across the NHL were talking about, it’s obviously bloggers that are responsible for these scandalous firing rumours.

Now, we could all be offended at these allegations. But I prefer the more glass full approach of being incredibly flattered! I mean, Mike Gillis thinks we’re talented enough to start rumours about a head coach being fired apparently out of thin air. It sounds like he admires our pluck and gumption.

Gillis has made several mistakes recently, most notably turning his embarrassment of riches in goal into two Swedish rookies who aren’t sure if they want to be Batman. Or almost guaranteeing no free agents of any consequence will want to sign here in the off season. But rest assured, Mike Gillis is not afraid to voice how highly he thinks of us bloggers. And for that I salute him.


Friday Afternoon Link Roundup

This video of Ryan Kesler visiting EA sports in Vancouver is worth a watch.  I love his sense of humour.  He should bring out that Robin Hood goal celebration in Canucks games again.  Heh.

Here’s a sweet article about Matty Ohlund from  He’s having more fun this season than he did when he was younger.  Make sure you check out that smile.  It sounds like he kind of wants to stay around.  He’s dreammmmy.

Here’s quite an interesting article from Team1040 with quotes from Mike Gillis about the culture around the team and in Vancouver and how’s tried to change it since coming in as GM.  He’s the man with the plan.   

“My linemates [Mats Sundin, Pavol Demitra] are telling me to shave my head to match them, but I don’t know if my wife would like that too much.”  Kes in the Vancouver Province

Heh.  His wife is right, he does have nice hair.  But how rad would that be for the playoffs?  It would grow back eventually.

Lady BaBa is rumoured to be in net tonight against the Avalanche.  Let’s hope the boys play better than they did last night.  What a lazy effort that was.  Go forth and kick Colorado ass my darlings.

Odds and Ends

–  This general consensus around the media outlets that the Canucks were big losers yesterday annoys me.  Yes, Gillis stood pat.  Yes, I had mentioned that another 3rd line center would have been useful, but whatevs.  Prices were too high.  Gillis said no to the recent Canucks trend of giving up 2nd rounders for mid range rentals and said go forth my team that has won 11 of 13 and continue to kick ass.  Which is smart considering the Canucks prospect cupboard isn’t brimming over yet.  He added defensive depth before the deadline for nothing. 

The Canucks didn’t get Jay Bouwmeester, because they didn’t want to part with the badassness that is Kevin Bieksa/Alex Edler/whatever else Florida wanted.  No shit.  That would be madness.  This way Jay Bow Bow is aware who wanted him when July 1st comes along.  And we all know Gillis has wooing skills that are off the charts.  Just ask Mats Sundin.  It’s time to accept Gillis is a total pimp.

–  TSN was practically drooling over Darryl Sutter and the Flames move to get Olli Jokinen.  Ehhh.  I think there’s a reason why Phoenix was rushing to get rid of him after not even a full season.  There’s rumours he’s a giant dickface.  Oh and he’s yet to appear in a playoff game.  We’ll see how Calgary’s chemistry works out…

–  This piece  in the Financial Post about the Aqulinis is downright juicy.  There’s all kinds of details about their purchase of the Canucks, and their other business dealings.  Who knew that they owned every single Pizza Hut in BC?  Odd.  The part that really got my attention was the quotes about Dave Nonis. 

A well-placed Canucks source, however, claims Nonis was fired because Aquilini found him to be “the most disloyal guy you’ll ever meet in your life. He didn’t care about winning, he didn’t care about success in the organization, he only cared about survival, self-preservation.” What Aquilini wanted “and what Nonis did, were two different things,” says the source.

A well-placed Canucks source, however, claims Nonis was fired because Aquilini found him to be “the most disloyal guy you’ll ever meet in your life. He didn’t care about winning, he didn’t care about success in the organization, he only cared about survival, self-preservation.” What Aquilini wanted “and what Nonis did, were two different things,” says the source.

Pretty scandalous.  I feel like the Canucks could be written into a soap opera.  Days of our Rinks.  Rookies and the Restless.  One Season To Win.  I just hope one of the Sedins isn’t an evil twin and Pavol Demitra doesn’t get shoved down an empty elevator shaft by Michael Grabner.

–  I try not to get too girlie around here, but let me just say that I think the Canucks are singlehandly working to get me to reproduce.  The Vancouver Sun  did quite a sweet article on all the new dads on the Canucks with pictures included.


SUN0302 DAD 2.jpg



Look What I mailed Mike Gillis…


Humming Giraffe’s Bill For Alcohol Consumption

1 bottle of Jameson’s whiskey

3 mickeys of Captain Morgan’s spiced rum

4 26s of Stoli vodka

12 beer

1 40 of tequila

1 bag of limes for tequila

1 knife for limes for tequila

1 bag of salt for cut limes for tequila

1 salt shaker to put the bag of salt into for the cut limes for the tequila

Total: $300 approx. Or 1 plane ticket to Sweden would suffice.


Application For Head Coach Position


Work well with Swedes

Players will have high self esteem because I will call them pretty

Not afraid to call them mentally deficient dumbasses if they take stupid penalties

Enjoy seeing guys skate on the same line for longer than the length of an ABBA song

Nice wardrobe

Love going to IKEA

Can count to 5


May show up to work drunk if losing streaks get too bad

May lose ability to speak coherently after truly terrible periods

– Can be called at home at any hour. References available upon request.


So, who’s deep into their tequila bottles now?  My oh my.  This is getting painful.  That almost win against San Jose was supposed be a step in the right direction, and they were supposed to be re energized after the all star break.  Le sigh.  So much for that. 

Yes, the refs hosed us a little bit in this one, but whatever Canucks.  That’s still no excuse to give up THREE freakin power play goals to one of the very worst power play teams in the league.  You’re supposed to get pissed at the hoser refs and put up a kick ass penalty kill. 

The defence is STILL running around like they’re all on mescaline.  Lui’s back in between the pipes, so there is really no excuse for it.  Oh and excuse me, JOEL WARD, whoever you are, I do not appreciate seeing my favourite player bleed enough to need stitches from your ugly ass elbow.  Yeah, guys with scars are hot, but I didn’t really need to see this phenomenon enacted in real time.  Then you forced me to feel uncomfortable that Matty Ohlund was slashing someone.  You should have talked to Mikko Koivu about how much Matty Ohlund dislikes having his Swedish eye region messed with.  Jerk. 

Didn’t you love seeing AV mix the lines up when the Canucks were UP by two goals?  Wasn’t that fun and useful? 

Oh and NOW, our lovely spiraling into a pile of crap team, is reportedly fighting in practice!  I don’t think I’ve seen the Canucks do this yet.  How exciting!  From the Vancouver Sun.

They can’t win a game to save their lives, but the Vancouver Canucks have their game faces on at practice today at UBC.

Losers of eight straight home games, the Canucks’ tension and frustration boiled over with a practice altercation involving defenceman Willie Mitchell and winger Mason Raymond.

Mitchell ran at Raymond during a drill and, when the speedy sophomore came back at the veteran in the corner, Mitchell punched Raymond in the head and cross-checked him hard on the shoulder.

The fracas drew several players and coaches, and tough defenceman Shane O’Brien skated to Raymond’s defence and challenged Mitchell to fight before tempers calmed.

Centre Mats Sundin, meanwhile, has been reassigned to the checking line. He is practising between Ryan Kesler and Alex Burrows.



Isn’t that just heartwarming?  Now, I’m sure this was slightly exaggerated by the newspaper folk, but there was obviously something to report.  Maybe I should say that it’s good they’re showing passion?  I should admit that I got what you might call…slight swoony feelings about SOB coming to little baby Mason Raymond’s rescue.  It’s like a FAIRY TALE!  I do love when he does that. 

I also loved that little slip in at the end of the article about how the most highly paid bald Swede ever is playing on the checking line in practice.  Nice to see he’s anchoring that second line like he’s supposed to.  *Slow clap for AV*

Time to hold on to your hats, I think.  It’s going to be an interesting few months.  Make sure that liquor cabinet is well stocked. 

Confidence, My Pretties

The Canucks get set to face the surging Blue Jackets tonight, in the middle of their biggest slump of the season.  Not exactly joy inducing.  The Blue Jackets have a rookie of the year candidate in goal and have a chance to make the playoffs for the first time in franchise history.  It’s a pretty cool story actually, but I just don’t want it to be the Canucks spot they take, ya know?  So, this is a good time as any to stop losing.  Tonight is the Canucks 3000th regular season game, so why not show some damn pride and get a convincing win in this special game, eh?  3000 games is pretty damn cool.  I’ve only been a serious fan for oh…210 regular season games and 12 playoff games, though I hope the next 3000 games I see are even better than the first 3000.  I’m totally going to be one of those crazy crotchety old lady fans that whine to their kids that they’ve seen thousands of Canucks games without seeing them win the Cup and no one can match their suffering.  Heh.

I rode horses for years.  Competed and jumped things and everything.  When my horse and I struggled, and couldn’t do anything right, we went back to the basics.  You lowered the jump height.  You took it one jump at time.  One turn at a time.  That’s what the Canucks have to do tonight.  Lui just has to make that save on the first shot.  They just have to get a nice pass up the boards out of the zone.  Hordi and the fourth liners just have to finish their checks.  Burr and Kes and O’Brien should play their rough game and worry about the penalties later.  I mean, I don’t want them taking a poor Jacket’s head off, but don’t give them an easy game either. 

So yeah, all I’m saying is, they can get that confidence back, they can get that old swagger where they thought they could play with anyone in the league back.  They just need one good play, one good shift, one good period, and they’re on their way.  This team is too good to be left out of the playoffs completely.  I’m not ready to call them a contender, but if they missed the show altogether, that would be a huge disappointment.

Happy Meals is back in.  He gets to play with Demo and Big Baldy.  Pyatt’s with the twins.  Big Bear stays with Kes and Burr and Hansen gets the 4th line spot with Hordi and Balls.  Raymond is the healthy scratch, which you kind of saw coming.  He’s looked very good at times, but not recently.  Any of these lines are able to do some damage.  Let’s hope they decide to click tonight.

Oh and just in case you didn’t know, Mike Gillis is a total badass.  I’m contemplating getting Gillis tattooed on my bicep.  Heh.  From the Vancouver Province.

There was Canucks’ general manager Mike Gillis roaming the GM Place halls.

He wasn’t hiding. No, he was as blithesome as you will ever see him, embracing the situation.

Grinning wryly and armed with his acerbic wit, he revelled, as he sometimes does, in needling reporters.

He gets such a kick from the hyperbolic media. His personality comes alive any time someone doubts him. It brings out his best.

“Our sports psychologist is here, just let me know if any of you need to talk to him,” he joked.

So remember boys, you’re all pretty and wonderful and talented and if you win tonight I’ll bake you some brownies or cupcakes or something.

Four Things

1. has a great article about Jannik Hansen.  His overall game is so strong even if he’s not scoring buckets of goals.  It’s pretty cool that he is one of the only Danish players in the NHL.  I’ve been talking him up like crazy, and it’s nice to see that people outaide Vancouver are starting to notice how fabulous he is.

2.  Cody Hodgson wants me to keep writing about him.  He had another three points for the second consecutive game in  the World Juniors exhibition game against Finland.  I am SO excited to see him in a Canucks sweater.  He was really close to making the team this season, and he should have an even better chance next year.

3.  Gillis sure is having a good year, isn’t he?  Not just because of Sundin.  I really enjoyed his interview on After Hours on Saturday.  He’s a very smart guy and I like all the little things he’s done to make this team better.

4.  I’m liveblogging the Canucks/Ducks game again tonight in the Canucks FanZone.  It’s always a good time over there.  If you need a break from the holidays you should definitely drop by.

Four Quick Things

1.  Someone told me it’s Mike Gillis’ birthday today.  Happy Birthday, big GM man!  Thanks for bringing this group of guys together that have for the most part been very surprising and fun to watch.  I hope they get you a win tonight.  Enjoy yourself.  I think I’ll save the big jumping out of a cake celebration for when you get us a Cup.

2.  I believe certain people witnessed Lui skating! WOOOOO!  The best news I heard all day.  Not that I don’t trust our back up goalies, but it’s good to hear.

3.  Hordini is injured and Jason Jaffary has been called up from the Moose.  I’ve always liked Jaffary, and maybe he’ll have a better showing this season when there’s not pressure to fill in on the second line.

4.  Last but certainly not least, today is the start of 16 days of celebrating Trevor Linden on which will lead right up to his retirement game.  Today you can remember little baby Trevor being drafted.  Nice move by the Canucks.  I’m really looking forward to the retirement ceremony.